I don't mean to sound contrived
but I don't want to be alive.
Into death to take a dive
so deep that I do not survive.
Set me free from mortal chore
for life is such a horrid bore.
I just don't like it anymore
and want to walk the golden shore.
Each day is harder than the last
one that has come and now is past.
Untie me now from the mast
for misery is unsurpassed.
Every second getting closer
to the day I am no more sir.
Thought I could be a composer
but I was only a poser.
I wish tonight I could have slept
so death my life could intercept.
In my rest upon me crept
so dawn from my eyes was kept.
I think I should end my life
with pills or jump or steely knife.
I'm just tired of the strife
the tragedy and pain so rife.
I am going to sleep now
and hope and pray and plead somehow.
That the gods do not allow
mine eyes to open on my brow.
Thought at first that love could save me
from my head so weak and hazy.
Now it seems a thought so crazy
for thoughts of hope were far too hasty.
And I know that somebody
will show her these words that I bleed.
Then she'll run farther from me
and her face I will never see.
Wish we could have had a chance
besides this long distance romance.
I am lost within my trance
and now within my mind we dance.
I love you so very much
that I know I am just a crutch.
My love for you now is such
that I won't taint you with my touch.
One day you will forget me
it won't be very hard you see.
At least then you will be free
from my epic tragedy.
